Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Differently Pierced

   I wear a small gold hoop earring in my left ear

   ...and a small heart-shaped, gold stud earring in my right ear.

   Different earrings aren't much of a fashion statement to me - although the concept is cute, to be entirely truthful.

   I say that they're not a fashion statement to me because: one, I always wear my hair loose, and it covers my ears; two, my earrings are small and aren't showy, which means that they're barely noticeable - besides, if they were, at any point of measurement (mm, cm, etc.) larger than they are now, I wouldn't wear them since I will find them ridiculous.

   The whole point of me wearing a different earring on my left ear from the one on my right ear surrounds a little story:

   The small gold hoop earring once had its beloved. I used to wear them all the time - you see, the holes of my ear piercings are rather small and thay pair of earrings is the only pair that I wear since they are thinner and finer that most earrings ever given to me. More often than not, if I decide to wear something else other than those earrings, my piercings get irritated.

   One day - it was some time in the afternoon, I think - I realized that I wasn't wearing one of the earrings anymore. Of course I searched all over my boardinghouse: but really, who am I kidding? I had already fixed my bed in the morning - the earring could have been tossed anywhere (perhaps in the damned space under the closet?); I had already taken a bath, which means the earring could be anywhere in the sewerage system of Baguio City; AND, I have already gone to school - and my beloved earring could be anywhere in the dust-ridden school with its foot-shuffling student population. In short, it is, I can presume, gone.

   Given that my ear piercings are small, I need another earring to put in my bare ear piercing before the piercing 'closes.' So I decided on a small heart-shaped, gold stud earring. Of course, my ear complained a lot; did itchy tantrums, turned red and even (for some odd reason that I do not know) developed tiny wounds on the skin surrounding the piercing (those that I'd like to call galis... eww). It took about two weeks of alcohol therapy* to get my ear to accept that the hoop earring is a goner.

   Once I had gotten use to the earrings being different, I even tend to forget they're even there.

   All I want is for my ear piercings to remain open, period. Not really the so-called 'style.' I never did do well with 'style.' There is always a sort of global conspiracy regarding 'style' (amazing, I seem to speak of it like it's a swearword).

   I just want to keep my piercings open, I repeat, just to keep them open - in case someone gives me pearl or topaz earrings, maybe. Or so I can show off something if - IF EVER I decide to ALWAYS put my hair up. Huh.

   There was one time that I had my head on my grandma's (my partner in crime) lap and she was running her fingers across my hair when she noticed that my earrings were different. She laughed when I told her what had happened and said, "Pa-uso ka ah."

   Huh.

[* Alcohol Therapy: The process of pouring alcohol (one that sanitizes, NOT the one that gets someone drunk, huh) into the wound or itchy area of the skin in a manner of an hourly basis... if not every few minutes.]


Posted at Wednesday, February 06, 2008 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Living the Nightmare

I

Lies.

For a moment you start getting angry.

Then the anger subsides;

But it doesn't go away.

Then you realize -

The pages of the book is now forever stained.

Forever stained with all the lies.

 

II

There is no turning back.

How trite.

Anyway...

 You just learn to live with it.

Lies are...

Unfortunately real.

Too real, in fact.

Too real that they're all too surreal.

 

III

They're real no matter how unreal they are.

 

IV

Now they just pass by.

You barely notice them.

It's all too tiring anyway.

You try to not care.

 

V

One day, you look at your book:

And you just don't care anymore.


Posted at Wednesday, January 30, 2008 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Paranoia II

   (where the hell is Paranoia I?)

   It's called paranoia, dear people. The sudden thoughts of seemingly impossible things that seem so real.

   Here I am, typing at my favorite Internet Cafe, when everyone inside the place started coughing and coughing and coughing.

   Sudden thoughts of irrational things popped into my head. Like that these people share a common thing with me. Lung cancer. Of course that it is irrational. It's probably that everyone else is with dry cough. I don't have lung cancer. Although I may die of it someday. I have friends who smoke and though I do not smoke, I may be a victim of secondhand smoke. But, really, I am being irrational. This is irrational. 

   But then...

   Like Cosmo always says: Or is it?

   (this appeared in my other blog with Paranoia I: Truth Has Gone Spiral)


Posted at Tuesday, January 15, 2008 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Friday, January 11, 2008
Stagnant

    Lately, I haven't been posting anything.

    My mind's in a muddle. And there are times when my mind is NOT in a muddle and I post ridiculous entries, what more when my mind IS in a muddle?

Posted at Friday, January 11, 2008 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Saturday, December 08, 2007

   And we're back.

   That sudden construction of Blogdrive was so sudden that it irritated me. Duh. Of course it did. Imagine typing in your url and discovering that it was gone. Well, not really gone, but you get what I mean. Even if it was only for a short while, it still bugged me.

   Yep.

   We're back.


Posted at Saturday, December 08, 2007 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Yay for Me!

   It's amazing how one day you seem to be able to charm anyone you meet.

   Let me say it: it feels good.

   While I am one to pull people's legs the mean way, I am mostly genuinely nice. But then, the concept of impression management or presenting oneself in accordance to the situation, I believe, is one way of pulling a person's both legs. What?

   Oh, but who cares? Getting people to agree to whatever you say and to be ultra-nice to you is one art I am pushing to perfect.

   Oh, oh. Nonononononono...

   Rhetoric is not used here. Nope. Something better than that.

   Something I like to call my sickness.

   Randomness.


Posted at Tuesday, December 04, 2007 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Friday, November 30, 2007
Whoa

Black Cat
Mayday Parade

Close up camera one
the hero sings in this scene
the boy that gets the girl gets to go home where they get married
but stop the tape,
the sunset still looks fake to me
the hero looks like he can't breathe
the damsel just left everything

you're like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
and you're gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa
you're like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
and you're gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa

oh close up camera two
cause the hero dies in this scene
your inspiration is the loss of absolutely everything
and flashback on the girl
as we montage every memory
and we bleed out in the bathroom sink
and we fade out as the soundtrack sings:

you're like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
and you’re gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa
you're like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
and you’re gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa

she said get your hands off of my star
it's not your part but all your fault
and this jealous actress has a habit of making things sound way too tragic
get your hands off of my star
it's not your part but all your fault
and this jealous actress has a habit of making things sound way too tragic

and this jealous actress has a habit
of making things sound way too tragic
oh this jealous actress has a habit
of making things sound way too tragic.

you’re like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
you’re gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa

you're like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
and you’re gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa
you're like a black cat with a black back pack full of fireworks
and you’re gonna burn the city down right now
whoa whoa-ahh

and this jealous actress has a habit
whoa


Posted at Friday, November 30, 2007 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  

Crapola

   The last thing I need right now are traitors; people whom you can't trust, people who drop you the time you need their help.

   No, this isn't about me.

   But doing something like that to a friend of mine has merited the right to a #1 in the blacklist.


Posted at Friday, November 30, 2007 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Mind Transitions for An Essay on the Term "Angst"

   What are you afraid of?

   What is it that we dread - that which we fear of encountering?

   Is it really that - fear?

   We fear - we fear something, probably. Rational fears, irrational fears. Or something unexplainable, perhaps. Do we fear the unexplainable? What, exactly, would that be? I honestly haven't any idea. What's that? The beyond? Do we fear what's beyond? What is there...  beyond? I don't know.

   Exactly. I don't know. UFOs, maybe. Alien civilizations who think of us earthlings as rather interesting species of amoeba. Beings that look like us who believe that their planet is the only place where life exists.

   Or... or...

   ... something else, probably.

   Let's talk about the afterlife. Do we fear it? Do you? Do I? I'm not going to lie: something I know nothing about is rather spine-chilling. So let's drop the topic like a hot potato. Something can be said about it, but I don't think anyone's in the right position to say something about it that can be taken as truth. I mean, when you die - you...

   ... die.

   I haven't met anyone from the afterlife, anyway. So there's really nothing to be said - and I won't go and try to philosophize about death. I don't think it'd work for the time being.

   Speaking of which, I keep talking about something. Heidegger talked about nothing, the concept of Nihil (which I must say, I cannot interpet), and here I am talking about something.

   I don't think I interpret Heidegger well - come to think of it, I don't think I can interpret him at all.

   Heidegger's concept of angst,  that which I pertained to as dread is connected to nothing; my concept of dread is connected to something - which is precisely the reason why my paper on Heidegger in my Contemporary Philosophy class three semesters back merited a low grade - it isn't "Heideggerian" at all (I don't know if such word exists).

   Of course it isn't.   

   Heidegger's concept of nothing is not something to be taken lightly. This entry is just another entry to keep my brain functioning - even though malfunctioning would be the much more appropriate term.


Posted at Tuesday, November 27, 2007 by brunettewriter
(1) psycho just spoke up  




Monday, November 26, 2007
...whoosh...

   I love chimes.

   You know, the kind that makes tinkling sounds when the wind blows.

   It makes me feel calm, although a little on the sleepy side. The way I feel whenever the wind hits the back of my neck - calm, or maybe too calm.

   Which actually makes being out in a storm rather appealing.


Posted at Monday, November 26, 2007 by brunettewriter
psycho or not?  




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brunettewriter
November 20th 1988  (Age 21)
Female
Philippines

I am someone who loves eating ice cream and starts talking about things that jeopardize the light theme of eating ice cream.

Ice cream has that sort of effect on me.

I am taking up BA Communication Arts (major in Journalism, minor in Speech Communication) in University of the Philippines, Baguio, but I would very much love to be under the College of Social Sciences.

When asked, I don't say that I am a Communication Arts student, I say that I am Journalism student.

I love dark places, not because of weird reasons (before I had odd reasons, not anymore), but because my eyes have difficulty adjusting to well-lit places.

I've been having eye problems lately.

I prefer silence because I have issues regarding to noise. Apart from that, silence can be insulting, which I find convenient when facing certain people. I only talk much around people I like. Also, I like to define my personal space when I am with some people. I hate it when breathing space is so cramped. That must be why I hate large crowds, or even just plain crowds.

Sometimes, I say things another is better off not hearing. I can be utterly frank, sometimes; and it's not exactly precious.


   

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The only difference between you and me is that I am me and that you are you. It's not really something I think anyone would disagree on.


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Just like kitty here, I think I'll just go and enjoy life.

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